Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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