Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
