I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
smell my finger.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I am naked and annoyed.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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