I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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