matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
