Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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