I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Randomize
