Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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