I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize