It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
