yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize