I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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