I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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