Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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