How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
