there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
