So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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