If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You are the jesus of drinking
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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