We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
