That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
