Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
