i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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