grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
