Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
he fucked my hip out of place.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
