I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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