I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
