You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
