yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
This is the high leading the old right now
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
