Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize