I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Randomize
