If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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