Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
