No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
