I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
