Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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