That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
