I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
