i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
