It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
