he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
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