hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
It's official drugs can't kill me
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I love you. Go after that dick
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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