Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
