1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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