dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
