Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize