I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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