She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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