I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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