i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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