so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Randomize
